trust me i have no idea what to scribble here.

Pace.
I swear upon the God of Thunder himself - Zeus, it was moving slow like there was no tomorrow. Although, it has reached almost a full nail-biting year at this new company of mine, life in general has been moving real slow.

Pounds.
Oh hell no! Instead of losing precious kilos, I ended up gaining more. Come on I have my new "goal" programmed into my head like coordinates on a GPS, and I need my weight lost pronto. This one is too precious to slip away.

Partner.
"I will have this one on-the-go please, sir!". As express as it came, things just did not work out. Maybe I rushed in too fast, and regretted having a partner. For all I know, this was not the one! So all aboard ship, we are seeking for the one, again! Singles may apply.

Predilection.
I kid you not, I have no idea what that means. I dictionary.com'ed the word bias and voilà! Yes about being bias, no I am so not! I favour the righteousness of things. So i lean towards those who are right!

Portrayal.
Sometimes I sit down and wonder of what people see of me. Is it really that negative? or maybe am I just being over conscious. No matter what they do think of me, I always end up having a lot of fun - kudos to natural high!

Picture.
Picture this. Leaving to Chicago soon for training, but not too happy. I don't want to be alone there and I hate being alone. I love being surrounded by fun people. Arghh, I just going to let this pass and get over this real quick.

Playlist.
My favourite part of writing is that I get to post my favourite tune of the moment. I love sharing my tunes. It enhances so much things in my life. And before I leave you guys with this song, today's show has been brought to you by the letter "P".

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

where nightmares and dreams comes together.

For the past decades I have always been temperamental. But this week had been different. I suppressed my temper and could not retaliate for reason I totally understood. It saddens me that I can't offer my defense, which I know will come out as only cold temper.

But I am glad. It was well taken and well absorbed, without me even lending a helping hand, or in this case without me swinging my fist around. I learned that I need to be patient today on. Maybe this way I might live longer. But I admit, it was challenging to watch from afar all that heat being thrown upon.

That is why I prize. The calm and resilient spirit that I saw in that eyes, and I know it could withstand many more. If it was me, I would have showered a stinging rain towards this - a typical Scorpio. But somehow, it saddens me that I could not do it. Suppressing temper is not easy :(

Guide me, as I learned to catch the softer sides of things. This is me at my worst, and also at my best! Now I sleep silently. To wake up with a smile.

* My first post was actually a very destructive one, but I edited it into this, a more happier version.

I got myself in a headlock

Work, work, and more work.

That is how it has been lately. I as much as I am a famous whiner, this time I will not complaint much about the workload. I'm just floating through like a dried leave blown away on autumn breeze.

It's 4:18pm Saturday. Haven't slept in about 20 hours now. I hate office politricks. As much as I despise it, it will never fade away and will always linger around me. Be part of the system or be totally annihilated. True enough. Jump in the bandwagon now or you shall be condemned. I just have no idea. It is a simple concept in the office, we have the right clan, the wrong clan and the I have no idea what is going out but I want to stay out of trouble clan.

To play it safe, most of you would have chosen the third clan - I have no idea what is going out but I want to stay out of trouble clan. If you chose this, I am sorry people won't see you as a diplomat or a peacemaker... but more as a hypocrite or someone with no stance. I am loquacious, thus I am the enemy to most eyes. In this *cough* twenty* cough* six years living on planet earth, I've seen too many things to hate or love. In my past, I took things seriously and reacted boldly towards righteousness - only to later to find out that I've been fighting the battles with the wrong sides.

Relax. Observe. Listen. Learn. or ROLL as professor doctor me calls it. (hahahahaha, a new theory I made up for this post.) My first two weeks in the office, I did not have much friends. Everyone was pretty much busy with their own stuffs, so I did the ROLL. Okla, I don't even recall what I wrote above, I think it was straight from the heart, and definitely if from me it is pretty much a load of crap.

Since lately I've been smiling a lot, allow me to leave you with my favourite single... *drum rollls* headlock by Imogen Heap.


But wait... due to certain computer glitch, i have this video clip on. What the heck, enjois.

My return

Ho ho ho.

It's been what? 15 months since I last wrote something? Bloody hell. Ok I confess. I forgot I even had this blog. No seriously!

A lot has changed over the years. For once i think I gained like a gazillion pounds. Second I quit smoking for a year than came back smoking due to work-stress. Made new friends. Got closer to my old friends. Got a job as a copywriter, in a mobile content company then left it for a better paying job in a publishing company. All in all, I am a much happier person now. Uuuuuu, and I bought my first own car. Vroom Vroom.

Most of my friends are working right now, so everyone is pretty much busy during weekdays. However, we do meet up during most weekends. Cassandra is currently recording their first full-length, and expected to be released soon. I predict this will go BOOM.

Still living with my parents. Goddamn, when am I moving out? I think not anytime soon. I love me parents. I work night shift. That explain my ability to fight crime when the city sleeps - just like the Dark Knight. Ok enough mengarut. Will write soon.

Currently listening to:
Copeland - The Day I Lost My Voice (The Suitcase Song)

The Day I Lost My Voice (The Suitcase Song) - Copeland

hr@still-unemployed.com.my

Talk about stress.

Nothing beats being unemployed and still deciding on a career path to lead.
I graduated a few months back and I totally failed to see this coming through. I was too busy anticipating on my long-awaited graduation. As for the final few months before I left my university, all I had in mind was that employment is gonna come through easy and quick as I was pretty sure that my bachelor's degree was unique and had the particular demand for it. But maybe I am wrong.

Almost discouraging.
I applied, applied and stopped applying and re-applied to almost anything that I can think off. (Well, mostly)
I also learned that you don't need to have a degree to be an entrepreneur. Talk about choosing majors! As much low esteemed I may seem, I'm not. I have something extraordinary. However, I still need to get employed! Passion to pay my bills as well. I altered my resume for about a few hundred times now, thinking something must be wrong with it. Gosh, someone employ me. I can do a bus load of stuffs. Trust me, I won't be another guy on the couch in your company.

Distress!
Knowing that I'm on a highway and still contemplating on which exit to take.
I now compare myself to others. Like why wasn't I a TV star or a professional football player. Life seem easy for them, doing something out of passion and fun. Also why didn't I do a major in IT or Engineering - jobs seems to be flowing in that direction. All that I've been getting is telemarketing or outdoor sales jobs. I do not, I repeat.. do not need a tertiary education for that. If that was the case, I wouldn't have spent a Proton Waja equivalent amount of money to get a bachelor's degree.

Jobstreet.com is my best friend.
Trust me, at this times, you would be visiting the site more often than you actually visit porn sites. But still nothing to my avail. A pack of cigarettes would take away your stress, mostly when someone keeps telling you what they did at work today or when you bump into a friend and so happen to pop the question of your current employment status. A new fad of reading TheStar emerges every Saturdays - just to browse the recruitment section. Oh..and I forgot, Astro is not doing its job of keeping me occupied.

Departure.
I'm off to post few more resumes for a few jobs I scouted. But nothing seem to stir my interest. I want something challenging, something that would require me to put all my creative flows to attain result. I thing I would get that soon enough.. patience.

When my parents were pleased to know they do need to fund me anymore.
I thought otherwise. Haha.

Forbidden Island

I keep telling myself to write about my forbidden island post-graduation trip but I keep procrastinating on it. I've been busy sorting out my graduation and finding myself an ideal job. Later, I realised that ideal is a subjective term. What may seem ideal to me at this moment is having a career of passion, but of course passion still has to be able to pay the bills. During my intern days, I was busy seeking for an ultimate holiday destination to give me a time off before i begun working. Bali, Phuket, Cebu, Sydney.. you name it, i had thought of it. But when time came, I realised with my current savings, I am only able to settle in for a "Cuti-cuti Malaysia." Hey not bad what! Instead of going somewhere new, i decided to go to the same old Penang that had been my parent's favourite destination since I was a kid. To tell you the truth, there's something about this island that I'm very fond off. The food, the beaches or maybe the "anak mamis".

So packed with only our cameras and clothes, we drove towards the northern region of the country. Better still, to save up on our accommodations, Faliq's parents allowed us to stay at their condo in Bukit Merah. Even as it was about 45 minutes drive from the island itself, we decided that this plan would actually save us the accommodation cost, however we would only be able to be in Penang for a day trip. (finally ended up a whole long day - 10am till 2am next day in Penang)

The beautiful part of Penang is that since I've been there many times every places I visit or pass through would be a journey through memory lane. I recollected one of my fondest memory of the condominium just as I had bypassed the bridge. If I am not mistaken, 15th floor or so and the "Christmas Lights" and wave goodbye - great memories they were. According to various online food bloggers, Nasi Kandar Kampung Melayu was the ultimate nasi kandar experience. And so we tried. Im not sure I got there on a wrong day, but it was just mediocre stuff. But the good part was that the roti canai dude put up an awesome show by flipping the roti canai's doughs airborne!

Look! I can juggle dough!

MMM... I must be on some newspaper!

Mostly, this trip ended up being a photo whoring trip and we ended up taking pictures of us at almost anywhere. Back from Penang, I was home, unemployed a fresh graduate and doing nothng much then sitting around and browsing through jobstreet.com the whole day. Torrent downloads are also amongst my favourite pastime. If anyone reading this far and has the power to employ, let me know. hahahaha. I will let you off you miseries from reading this by a simple show of pictures of the remaining of the trip. Go to Penang, its worth it!

I'm on someone else's side mirror!

Rojak buah penang at its best!

Look mom, I can see home!

View of Penang from Bukit Bendera

Balik Kampung!

farewell to a friend

1st June 2007.

I was in Penang having a great vacation when I received a sms stating a dear friend, Nur Nikmat Selamat had passed away in a road accident. He was a very energetic and youthful person and we always had great laughs with him. I was shocked and immediately burst into tears as it had been almost 6 months since I last met him, and now I wouldn't have the chance to do so. He never failed to crack us up, but the fondest memories of him were always the ones in the mosh pit. Nikmat, you would be dearly missed and rest in our hearts. I would remember you every time I attend shows and save you a spot in the pit. My deepest condolences to his family members and may our muslim friends recite Al-Fatihah to our friend. May he rest in peace.

In loving memories, Nikmat. We love you bro!